What will you be when you grow up?

When a baby is born, everything they do from the very first minute is perfect. In fact, they do not have to do anything at all; it is enough simply to exist. Then, when they start “doing” things - raising their hands and feet, waving - the predictions begin about what they will become. Kicking strongly? They will definitely be a footballer. Like throwing a ball back and forth? A basketball player, what else. Stacking books on top of one another? A little scholar, a great professor of the future. Long little fingers? We can start saving for a piano.

Everyone imagines a happy adulthood for their child and tries to guide them toward it to the best of their ability. But what does “the best of our ability” mean? Is it enough that we mean well - can anything be justified that way? The world is constantly changing, and at an ever faster pace; what we believe is best today may be outdated tomorrow. We are exaggerating, of course, but there is some truth in it.

Back then - not so long ago, and the generation of today’s parents of young children belongs to this group too - the formula was simple: we went to college or university, and that was that. If someone wanted to “get somewhere,” they went (or their parents sent them) to law school, medical school, or business school. Those who liked foreign languages went to the humanities faculty. Those who liked philosophizing did too. Make no mistake, we do not consider one better than the other; there was simply a pattern for how people chose. (Generally speaking.)

The bravest ones (the “poor students”) were those who dared to say: I do not know what I want to be; I will wait and perhaps figure it out sooner or later. In the meantime, they either traveled abroad or started working. Many people discovered while working what they wanted to do later; some were quietly envious of them, while others deeply pitied them for missing out on the famous university life.

In reality, just as a preschooler cannot be expected to know what they will be when they grow up, the same is not necessarily expected of an 18-year-old either. Some people really do know from birth that they will one day become veterinarians or teachers, and eventually succeed, but that is rarer. Especially nowadays, when there are so many more professions and jobs to choose from, it is slowly becoming true that anyone can become anything - sometimes even without a qualification or, occasionally, expertise.

The secret may be to pay attention, to really get to know our children: what interests them and what they are good at. If there is a brilliantly handy child who is completely uninterested in literature or mathematics, they do not necessarily need to be sent to extra lessons just so they can be admitted to the so-called best schools. Not everyone needs to go to university to be successful - quite the opposite. University is a great thing, but only if you are genuinely interested in what you are there for.

Of course, we are not saying that someone should not acquire basic knowledge in every subject. But if we focus on what they are good at, encourage them in it, and support them, they will become confident enough to hold their own in areas where they may be weaker.

Because everyone is good at something. And the sooner we recognize this in our child, the easier things will be for both them and us later on. And if they make a mistake or choose the wrong school or career, something that is not right for them, all we have to do is stand by them and assure them that there will always be someone they can turn to for advice or simply an encouraging word.

Children are not little sheep that need to be herded. Rather, we should accompany them, help them, and stand by them - if they make a mistake, talk it through; if they fall, show them how to get back up. And if we do our job well, our reward will be the greatest of all: when they grow up, they will become happy, contented adults.